be social.

September 24, 2014

socialm

5 remarkably bothersome Social Media posts:

1. the attention grab. [it goes something like this: “ohhhhhh NOOOOOO. what a terrible horrible no good very bad day!!” and that’s all they say. let the comments of agonizing questions like “are you OK??” and “call me!!” begin.]

2. the butt plug. [that lovely person who takes the same picture over and over again, makes it into a frame of 6, and then posts about 4-17 times in a matter of 3 minutes. buzz kill. feed kill.]

3. the passer aggressor. [it astonishes me when i see a post that’s oh-not-so-subtly explaining how frustrated they are with a certain someone’s behavior or how upsetting it is that “people” can be so rude or how their c*** girlfriend totally slept with someone else.]

4. the un-appetizer. [food posts can be great. on Instagram i follow @dagmara_ch. she takes beautiful pictures of food that inspire me to eat better and make my meals prettier. however, i do not need to see a picture of soggy pancakes or a half-eaten hotdog. no necessito.]

5. the rant. [i believe social media is an incredible outlet to share your views, dreams, ambitions, successes, and crazy thoughts with the world. or whatever you want to share really. it’s akin to the butt plug though. can we please not fill everyone’s feed with your particular political views every second of every day? sometimes less is more. that is all.]

5 immensely lovable Social Media posts:

1. the accomplishment. [tell me what you’re most proud of. tell me what you’ve been sweating and bleeding over for 4 years and just completed. tell me how grateful you are for this amazing thing you finally got credit for. it inspires me and everyone else and if it doesn’t, who cares about those people anyway?]

2. the comedy. [i get most of mine from Twitter, but there are definitely other sites that provide my favorite jokesters an instantaneous audience to test their jokes. keep ’em coming folks. laughter is the best part of life and if you get more than 100 likes you’d better put that shit in your act.]

3. the big life moments. [similar to #1. if i follow you on any particular social media outlet i WANT to know when you have a baby or get married or fall in love or book your first acting gig or move to the big city or build your dream house. life’s biggest moments are meant to be shared. transitions in life can be overwhelming and daunting but change is beautiful ~ especially when someone’s open about it.]

4. the community. [a few of my friends only use social media to promote. themselves, business ventures, friends’ of friends business ventures, amazing causes, or just awesomeness going on around town. i don’t watch the news very often but i always feel in touch with my community.]

5. the skill. [we are all extremely good at something or several things. i love seeing someone share what they are profoundly good at. whether it’s taking honest and vulnerable photos, finding the most inspiring quotes you’ve never heard before, or creating the best damn quips that make everyone laugh in the middle of their day ~ who couldn’t use a little social media?]

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tell me about it Martha.

September 17, 2014

a_vineyard dock

10 lessons one can only learn on Martha’s Vineyard:

1. paddle ’til it hurts. [if you desire intense arm soreness mixed with the most peaceful solitude possible, get your butt in a kayak.]

2. rise and shine. [if you wake up early and walk straight onto the sand, the rest of your day will fall perfectly into place.]

3. hike it out. [if you wander through the woods with an open heart you will definitely run into an animal. like a cow or a peacock.]

4. enjoy the missions. [if you take an early drive for things like fresh eggs or home-baked pies, expect to have to do it a few times until you get it right.]

5. snap away. [if you want beautiful photos realize that every sunset here is different. take pictures every day, all day.]

6. converse. [if you want to safely get into a hammock in the dark after you’ve had a few drinks, just talk to it. gently.]

7. just ask. [if you want the best bagel you’ve ever tasted, ask your Aunt Stacy to make it from scratch.]

8. exercise the brain. [if you want to really test your Swiss cheese memory make sure to drive past places you last visited 15 years ago while completely high.]

9. make friends. [if you love dogs, give them cheerios and tummy rubs. and car rides. and walks on the beach. and cheerios.]

10. just book it. [if you want to sleep like a baby, smile like you’ve lost it, and embrace peace and joy like you mean it, don’t think ~ just go.]